The word “bucket” conjures certain favorable images of excess when it comes to food. Who among us wouldn’t accept a nice big bucket of salty, buttery popcorn at a movie theater? Who, barring vegans and people watching their diet, wouldn’t want to be tasked with scaling the crispy mountain that is a bucket of fried chicken? And who wouldn’t raise their hands in joy at an economy-size bucket filled with mac and cheese?
Wait. Did I lose you there?
Well, what may be an unfamiliar concept to most of us today, might become a staple of the kitchen another day, at least as far as this warehouse-club store is concerned.
Costco, home to cookies of magnitude, linebacker teddy bears, and Nutella for days has started selling a 26-pound, 10-ounce bucket of macaroni and cheese that will surely last families well into the zombie apocalypse, if it ever comes to that. Manufactured by the aptly-named company Chef’s Banquet, the elbow pasta and cheddar cheese sauce come separately packaged and uncooked, which is a relief because who would want to find a fridge big enough to store this? The bucket o’ yum serves 180, which makes it perfect for, uh, an extremely popular 10-year old’s birthday party, perhaps.
If you’re wondering why anyone could possibly need this much macaroni and cheese at once, a quick look over the other products that Chef’s Banquet sells reveals the brand’s leanings toward survivalists, or people who actively prepare for emergency events like floods and hurricanes (like we all should) or zombie invasions (less likely). For those, Chef’s Banquet provides 30-day meal supplies, 540 servings of cheese sauce (yes, really), and more.
But, if the mood strikes and you desire this nearly 27-pound bucket of well-reviewed, cheesy goodness in your home, this pail full of pasta is available to be delivered to you for the relatively low price of $89.99, including shipping. Currently it’s out of stock online (!!), but it should be back. And don’t worry if you can’t eat it right away, either — this delightful addition to the Costco shelves will last 20 whole years if unopened.
If you’re a non-member of Costco, look to Amazon, who also sells the tub of elbows and cheese for $149, although the reseller states the slightly ironic reason for the markup: they, unlike Costco, can’t buy in bulk.